Posted on June 13, 2007


Yesterday it was E’s birthday, and today is the Conquistador’s. In honour of the first of these people of startlingly different sizes is the following:

Yes, my paint skills leave much to be desired. Click on it to read. Happy Birthday dude! The Big Two Five!

As for the Conquistador, I wrote him a shite poem which I won’t pain you with. But here is some stuff he wrote some time back during a rhyme war on our google group – there was a startling outburst of talent considering everyone was at work:

Nigga what the hell happened to these days and times
When people care less bout homies than their nickles and dimes
When brothers shave to brothers without a thought in mind
These dawgs should be shot down and shaved to in kind
Playas who think they hot and thus they forgettin
The Great One who hit the spot and wins when he’s bettin
So all y’all around us, should we keep rappin
Or should I just stop these beats I am tapping.

Homies tryin hard to copy my line
thinking their rap’s comparable to mine
spitting off lyrics like trashy white swine
Chests out, grinnin, thinkin they’re fine
Don’t these here niggas know that its time
for a performance that will draw the line
between all dem newbies who ain’t got no spine
and the one, the only, the Great – that shines
so brightly that niggas be weepin and cryin

Now lemme just show y’all what you fools cant do
Rappin aint bout spitting out one word or two
its bout the flow that shoots through you
rhymes, beats and music, those are my crew
The Great One just does what all y’all can not do
Rappin is simple for a Great One or two
but you busters only good for kissin my shoes
while I’m pinning you down with my lyrics like glue
you be shocked and awed, cant believe it is true
You young ones should hurry on back to yo skoo’
and maybe learn something that benefits you
but rappin is something you just neva knew.

Yes, he seriously refers to himself as “the Great”, and yet has friends. As for the whole rap thing, I had no idea they had all this latent wannabe-ness buried inside. Sorry if anyone’s offended. There are other, more varied styles from the rest of the crew if anyone is interested.

Happy 24th, bitch.

Posted in: friends