Drivel and doodoo

Posted on January 22, 2007

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I normally spend the first half hour or so after my alarm goes off thinking of diseases I could possibly contract (or convincingly pretend to contract) to prevent me from going to work. I have already used my best one urinary tract infection once per job. Faisal once grilled me with great enthusiasm on the symptoms of this disorder for his own purposes, only to be deflated when he found out it was mostly experienced by women. I also randomly skived off once without providing any excuse whatsoever, leaving my loyal officemate to handle it. Last week I was laying face-down in my mound of blankets racking my brains for an ailment when I was gratifyingly and suddenly gripped with searing stomach pains. In alacrity I jumped up and ran to the bathroom where I experienced vicious diarrhea, the discomfort of which was thoroughly compensated for by my delight in having my prayers so promptly answered. Unfortunately, I then felt well enough to go to work and my ride was downstairs, so I went anyway but my day was still immeasurably brightened.

This morning as I wallowed in bed I thought about the things I was supposed to do at work today, and actually looked forward to one of them an utterly mundane legal research. Is this, I wonder, a sign of losing my marbles? I hastily shoved that thought back where it belonged and went back to feeling morose and despondent at the prospect of going to work. In protest at this unaccustomed burst of eagerness I have resolutely refrained from beginning that work for two hours now, even going to the lengths of novelreading, foulandta3miya eating, and chatting with one’s exes and coworkers. I’m not going to start enjoying my job!

Next up: report on my long weekend at Ras Shitan.

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Posted in: friends, human waste, work