The ForsoothGrandpa

Posted on June 6, 2006


My Geddo is so totally cool. He beat cancer and numerous other illnesses. He learns foreign languages, he paints, he was a member of the Communist Party in the 30’s, he is open about sex, and he is not in the least bit swayed by the astonishing tides of sexism, conservatism, and general conformism that have swept across Egypt in recent decades. He brought up two professional, successful women and he adjusted amazingly to moving to the United States in his 70’s. My mom was lucky to have him as a dad, and he is probably the reason why nothing in the least logical has ever exited her mouth. Why is it that men marry into families that are more liberal and generally cooler than theirs? Not that my dad isn’t great, but let’s look at this phone exchange:

Geddo: So you’re graduating on the 16th? Alf Mabrouk!
Me: Yeah, I wasn’t going to go, but then I decided to.
Geddo: Not go? Eh el kalam el faregh dah. I7tefly wembesetty.
Me: Yeah, but no one will be there to watch me.
Geddo: What about your friends? What about x and y (family friends)?
Me: Everyone I know is graduating with me, and I don’t like x and y. I do have a boyfriend though, he’ll be there.
Geddo: Tayeb, does he have a video camera? Make sure he takes pictures. And when will you open your own office? What about that apartment in Heliopolis – you can open it there!

And that was that. Whereas my dad, who frequently asks me with great suspicion if I’ve ever held a boy’s hand (“Me? La2 tab3an!”), would have had some combination of a seizure and a loosening of the bowels. Then he would have been on the first flight out once he came to and gathered his poo. Shouldn’t he try to recreate for me the circumstances under which he hooked up with my mom, OVER THIRTY YEARS AGO? He came to her house while they were dating, people. Whereas I will probably get married by telegraph. Sa3ayda!

I should probably email my grandpa this post. He emails!