Undergarments and miscellany

Posted on March 30, 2005


Today I during a class break went up to the front and spoke to the professor. While I was up there I noticed that she has no eyebrows and instead she has auburn eyebrow-shaped lines drawn on. I may have stared a bit and trailed off in my question.
Class resumed, and seated next to me was a guy in a neon pink shirt that I had commented on earlier. When I sat back down he said, “We match…my shirt matches your thong.” I have long decried this guy’s lack of boundaries, but I was mostly appalled that my neon pink granny panties, not thong, were visible to the entire class. The rest of my outfit was brown so there was no blending whatsoever. The ignominy of low rise pants! Who decided that having pants that may or may not reveal pubic hair is desirable?
As I was wandering around after class I ran into a favourite professor, and being me immediately acquainted him with the fact that I intend to lie on my resume and pretend that I had some law-related summer job…who’s gonna call Cairo and see? I simply must learn to control my tongue, I think.
On my way home I saw a red, shiny apple on the sidewalk. It had clearly lovingly been set aside for an in-class snack. Some girl is no doubt scrabbling around her laptop bag right now. Ha ha on you healthy bitch!