the last saturday night out…hopefully

Posted on March 20, 2005


Last night I went downtown for my friend H’s birthday. I got off the subway and found myself on the sidewalk with two bunches of guys who were on the same train as me. We all stood around trying to figure out with way was north and trying to extract clues from various signs and street cars. It transpired that out of nine people, no one knew which way to go.
“I am almost sure this way is north.”
“The street car is coming that way…so that’s west…so…yeah”. In the end we all got into different cabs, because walking was clearly too confusing a proposition.

I got to the club and not only was my friend’s name not on the guest list, but they refused to let all girls who were under 23 and all guys under 25 in. Arbitrary, no? Mention was made of the Ontario Human Rights code, just to let the guy know what kind of people he wasn’t letting in. Yeah!
We went to Devil’s Martini instead. The birthday girl had to bribe the bouncer to let 25 people bypass the line. It was an eclectic bunch to say the least…ages varied from 20 to 60 and there was every walk of life and ethnicity.
Devil’s Martini is a long thin club where any kind of walking is virtually impossible – never have I seen so many elbows brandished as weapons. Plus, they take your initials at the coat check. Apparently there’s a thriving business in stealing other people’s coats.
While I was looking around making observations a friend remarked to me, “Thinking of your blog?” God, that’s embarrassing. I did however also spend some time keeping an eye on my top, which has been known to release breasts on occasion. A girl complimented me on it and I asked,”It’s not too skanky?” and she said “Yes, but in a good way.” So we agreed to monitor each other’s mammary escape.
I also lost my gloves. These gloves have had a bit of adventure already…I left them in a taxi once, but fortunately the driver had given us his personal number so we could call him on our way back and take advantage of Attractive Ethnic Girl Discount. My friend S retrieved them when she took that cab back later.This time, I left the gloves on the bus or the subway – I was almost relieved. They’ve been trying to get away from me for a while and clearly realized that public transit was their best bet, although you would have thought that taxis would be good too. Go on, now, little wollen hands. Find a new friend!
Went home and ate a chocolate bar and went to bed.